Satirical Super Bowl media day captions

Seattle’s Patrick Lewis talks with the NFL’s “Deflategate” investigators.  (Mark Humphrey / AP)

Seattle’s Michael Bennett: “For the rest of Super Bowl week, you may refer to me as ‘Brock Stetson.’”   (Matt York / AP)

“Attention Media Day participants, please start forming lines for the mandatory 40-yard dash.”  (Rob Carr / Getty Images)

Bill Belichick: “This is smiling.”  (Gregory Payan / AP)

Bill Belichick thinks to himself: “Good thing Rex Ryan’s not around.”   (Gregory Payan / AP)

Robert Kraft: “Who wants to talk about underinflated balls? How about you? You wanna piece of me?”  (David J. Phillip / AP)

Russell Wilson: “I don’t care what my agent promised you I’m not wearing these during the Super Bowl.”   (Mark Humphrey / AP)

Seattle Seahawk Douglass McNeil III and Gina Holguim get in some practice for “Dancing with the Stars 2019.”   (David J. Phillip / AP)

“Yeeeaaah! OK! I can see the resemblance to Lil Jon,” says Marshawn Lynch.  (Elsa / Getty Images)

Thinks to himself: “Hmmm, maybe I shouldn’t try the Ball Boy gag on Belichick.”  (Elsa / Getty Images)

“For the last time my name is Darrelle Revis, and the next person that says ‘James Harden’ ...”  (Christian Petersen / Getty Images)

“Can’t believe I brought my bowling shoes by mistake. So embarrassed.”  (Rob Carr / Getty Images)

Michael Hoomanawanui seems to be thinking, “How do I break it to him that I’m Hawaiian?”  (Christian Petersen / Getty Images)

Rob Gronkowski: “You see all the hype over ‘Fifty Shades of Grey?’ Yeah, well, my movie’s going to be called ‘Fifty Yards of Gronk.”  (Elsa / Getty Images)

Johnny Weir: “I’m not bitter, Tara, I just want to know why there isn’t a figure skating media day.”  (Elsa / Getty Images)

“This is what I get for forgetting to bring my camera.”  (Elsa / Getty Images)

“Should someone tell these guys the Broncos didn’t make it?”  (Elsa / Getty Images)

Marshawn Lynch: “Pssst! I just figured out I can whisper and not get fined.”  (Christian Petersen / Getty Images)